*Yawn* ...Dang, I hope that nightmare where I got literally stabbed in the back and drowned didn't actually happen...(Of course not! It was only a dream! If only your save file didn't get corrupted.) What!? (*whispers* Huh... That did almost happen, but the Pansy would rather not remember that.) Oh, right... Hopefully the third playthough will have a better ending... (Not likely...)
Warning!: This is based upon a game that's rated M for Blood, Drug
References, Strong Language, Suggestive (read 'Sexual') themes, and
Violence. If any of these things offend you, don't click on the link.
'You will start from the beginning of the game, with information from previous playthrough(s). Would you like to overwrite this save data?'
-Yes-
-No-
Well, we haven't seen the True Ending yet, so...
'Data overwritten.'
For reasons of redundancy, we're going to skip the 3rd class cabin entirely. Instead we're going to pick up from when Junpei sees the other eight people...
'Junpei saw another person out of the corner of his eye.'
Of course, it can't be us, nobody here's been able to see us for the past two playthroughs...
'He stopped short, nearly tripping over the next stair, and looked. It wasn't just 1 person he'd seen... On the landing to the left of the stairs, there were 4 people staring at him... And on the right side, 3 more.'
Huh? Is there someone else here? (I have a bad feeling about this dude...) (Huh, there's another ghosting entity on this ship?)
'All told, there were 7 of them. It looked as though they had been on their way down the stairs. They'd stopped short when they saw Junpei, their eyes wide. He'd done the same of course, and now they stood there staring at one another. Junpei didn't move, one foot placed awkwardly on the next step, in the middle of a stride. Who were these people? This entire interaction lasted only a matter of seconds. The woman spoke to Junpei, and time began to move again.'
???: I guess there's another one of us now.
Hi Lotus, great to see you alive again!
'The woman was dressed, Junpei thought, rather like a [dancer]. Her clothes covered very little, and her prodigious jewelry little more.'
Dancer: Hey! You! Come on! Hurry!
Huh, Lotus, I think Junpei's still stunned by your radiant beauty. So, you like Christmas Cake? (Yeah, Mrs. Kashiwabara is a mother and has twins.)
'With no further ceremony, she ran, straight past Junpei and toward the doors behind him. The sudden proximity of a woman with such striking assets left Junpei momentarily stunned...'
Told ya!
'...But the others wasted no time, and quickly followed the strange woman. The fist to pass Junpei was a young man with [silver hair]. He threw a quick glance in Junpei's direction as he ran, muttering...'
Well, I do find odd hair colors hot as well... What!? Are you gay or something!? No, I'm actually bi, if you must know...who ever you are...
Silver: Hmph. One of us, huh...?
'Following him was an older man, his face calm and without fear. Soft wrinkles sprouted from his eyes, and he came close enough as he passed for Junpei to see wisps of grey in his hair. His composure and shock of hair stuck Junpei as rather like that of an elderly [lion].'
Speaking of descriptions, I'm seeing a rather plainly dressed dude about my age who's... too buff for my tastes, and has this strange orange-blonde colored hair with a similarly colored moustache and goatee...
Lion: Going up won't do you any good! There are 2 doors, but neither of them will open!
Sorry I can't do any proper introductions, my point of view character's in too much of a rush...
'The next to speak was a girl with [pink hair] and a high voice.'
Pink hair: Come on! Aren't you coming? You gotta hurry!
(Yeah... I know she has odd-colored hair, but loli's are more of your little brother's taste.) Indeed...
'Her small hand was wrapped around the wrist of another man... His eyes were closed, almost as though he were sleeping. His features were graceful, almost serene... And he was dressed rather elegantly for someone his age. Something about his posture seemed very refined, and Junpei couldn't help feeling he was noble and dignified, somehow. He'd certainly never seen one, but this man seemed like what Junpei had always imagined a [prince] would be like.'
(He can be my Prince Charming any day... *swoon*)
Prince: That's 9 of us, then. All of the cards are in hand.
'What does "All of the cards are in hand" mean, he wondered.'
(He knows something, and I know just what!) Remember the spoiler gag. (Right.)
'Junpei opened his mouth to ask what the other man had meant, but the girl with pink hair rushed past him, and they were gone. He turned just in time to see 2 more people running toward him. One of them had hair like a [bird's nest], and looked as if a stiff breeze might topple him...'
(And this dude's going to be nacho topping soon...) (Monster! Do you have to bring back the unholy nachos!?) (Yes, yes I do.)
'...And the other was a veritable [mountain] of a man.'
(And our amnesiac cop has returned!)
'The scrawny one said nothing, and scuttled past Junpei as though he were running from something...'
Mountain: Hey! What the hell're you just standing there for!? Didn't you hear him?!
Junpei: ...
...Must be still in shock, I just got over nearly dying from stabbing and drowning!
Mountain: The doors on A Deck are no good!
That's because we don't have the keys yet.
Mountain: We gotta check the doors on B Deck!
Well, all of them are locked in some fashion...
Mountain: Got it!? Now go!
Do we look like the Elite Beat Agents?! (*facepalm*)
'Before he had a chance to respond, the man laid a massive hand on Junpei's shoulder. With no more effort than Junpei would have used to brush aside a fly, the man shoved him out of the way.'
Junpei: Whoa...!
'Thrown off-balance by the man and recent events, it took Junpei a few steps to get his bearings. He finally regained his balance and looked up, at what the other 7 had been running toward. There were 2 pairs of large iron doors set into the wall in front of him. They looked quite sturdy, and each had handles jutting from them. Written across the surface of each door in red paint was a number. The door on the right had a [4].'
The door we picked the first time.
'And the door on the left had a [5].'
Which is the door we picked the second time. There isn't a third choice so which door will we redo in this one? (Dude, you still have your notes.) Oh, right. Moving on...
Silver: They're the same...
'The guy Junpei had decided to call Silver was mumbling to himself.'
Silver: The room I woke up in had a number on the door, just like that.
Lion: You too, eh.
So, I'm NOT seeing things. You three are here, yet not in the original game...
'With an arched eyebrow, the lion looked over at Silver.'
Lion: My cell was the same. A number upon the door. I opened it, ran down the hallway outside, and found myself in the rather grand room full of stairs, as, I suspect, did the rest of you.
'It was as though the floodgates had been opened--they all began to talk at once.'
'"Me too." "I did too." "Yeah, a door with a number on it." It soon became clear that each one of them had awoken in a room with a locked door, and solved a puzzle to escape. They'd all ended up in the same room... Almost as though they'd been guided there...'
Dancer: Yes, we all saw the same thing! That's not important! We need to hurry!
Silver: Ya think I don't know that, lady!?
'Before the dancer had time to finish--Silver was already running.'
I know this is kind of delayed but... Santa, or "Silver" at the moment, has no relation to a certain psychic hedgehog. (Or is he...?)
'He grabbed hold of the door labeled [5] and pulled. However...'
That did a truckload of...nothing!
Silver: Fuck! It's not opening!
*insert image spot here* *LOL* That's just cracking me up!
Silver: This damn thing won't even budge!
(That sounds more like something you'd hear coming out of Shadow's mouth.)
Mountain: Move. You're in the way.
'The mountain grabbed Silver's shoulder and tossed him aside. His path cleared, he took a few steps back, then threw himself at the door. Once... Twice... 3 times... 4 time... The door shook as his body slammed into it, but showed no signs of breaking or opening. The mountain threw himself at the door again. Junpei turned toward door [4]. Next to the door, on the wall, was a small box.'
(Ah, the RED to the DEAD.) Heck, even your text is highlighted red!
'It looked just like the one that he'd seen in his room, next to the door. If it was the same, then...this door was likely locked as well...'
And, indeed, it is.
'Still, he had to check. Junpei grabbed a handle and threw all of his weight onto it.'
Junpei: RRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHH! Gah...!
'It was locked as tight as the door next to it, as he'd suspected.
Junpei: Damnit!
'Junpei punched the door. It did not respond.'
It might as well be a corpse.
'Were these the only doors, he wondered. He'd barely finished the thought when the C Deck plate he'd passed on his way up sprang, unbidden, to his mind. His body moved before he had time to think. Junpei turned, and ran back toward the stairs. He had scarcely taken a step, when--'
(Enter Akane, stage upper left!)
'At the top of the stairs, next to an ornate clock embedded in the wall, he saw a person. It was a girl.'
(Told ya!)
'She looked to be the same age as Junpei. He froze, unable to look away from her face. He wasn't confounded by her beauty, or something equally silly...'
Although she IS beautiful...
'No, there's was another reason he couldn't take his eyes off the girl. Junpei had seen her somewhere before.'
Yeah, we have as well. (Indeed.) (Indeed.)
'He couldn't quite remember where, but he knew... He knew he'd met her before. The girl, too, stared at Junpei, similarly stunned. Her response suggested she'd seen him before as well.'
???: ...
Junpei: ...
'Without saying a word, Junpei walked slowly toward her. She didn't move. It was almost as though she was held in place by some sort of magic spell.'
Did someone around here cast "Hold Person" or something!?
'As Junpei stepped onto her landing, the spell broke. No sooner had he set his foot down, then the whole ship shook a second time.'
???: Aah!
'The quake caught the girl unprepared, and she fell--'
(Heh-heh...) (Eww! Not in THAT sense!)
'Moving on instinct, Junpei leapt to catch her... Or so he thought.'
This is going to be awkward...
'Her face was far closer than it should have been; mere inches from his own. He was flat on his back, and she had landed squarely on top of him. The girl seemed as confused as he did, and her face suggested she still hadn't fully recovered from seeing him. For a moment that seemed to stretch for a very long time, they stared at one another. The this stopped shaking. Everything was quiet.'
(Too quiet...)
'Water could be heard from the bottom of the ship, lapping faintly at walls and ceilings, but eventually that faded as well. The silence was complete, a thick, muffling blanket... At last, the girl opened her mouth.'
No! We're never going to hear what kind of code name Junpei would've gotten... Hey, I can't hear that voice again. Strange...
???: Oh my gosh... Is that you, Jumpy!?
'Jumpy... Jumpy... Her words echoed through Junpei's head, and suddenly, his memory returned.'
Hopefully none of the despair-inducing memories from the other timelines/playthroughs...
Junpei: A-Akane!?
'Why hadn't he realized it before?! The girl was [Akane Kurashiki]. She and Junpei had been friends in childhood--they'd gone to elementary school together for 6 years.'
(Including that incident with the rabbit hutch.)
'But...what was she doing on the ship?!'
(To... be forced to play this game, like you are! Isn't that o-obvious!) (You're hiding something.) Only because I'd kind of forbidden Akurei to give out direct spoilers.
'Her soft eyes were only inches away from his own...'
(Dude, in the end, all human eyes are soft. And filled with jelly!) (Eww!)
'He could feel the warmth of her face... Feelings he'd thought long-forgotten began to work their way to the surface...'
Kind of like hope... (Or... "Love"! *swoon*)
'He could feel his face heating up. At that moment... A speaker crackled to life, and a cold, eerie voice filled the room.'
???: Welcome aboard.
(Hi Zero!)
???: I welcome you all, from the bottom of my heart, to this, my vessel.
Well, here's one part where he didn't say "this ship"...
'With the voice's invasion, the spell between Junpei and Akane was broken, and all hints on burgeoning romance instantly forgotten.'
(Indeed, there's more important things to think about. Like "not dying"!) And we have a little hint of Akurei's original self.
'They hurriedly untangled themselves from one another, and struggled to their feet. Their 7 companions had heard the voice as well, and many of their faces had gone pale.'
Counting us and this new person, there's... 11 companions. For a total of... (Thirteen! This is bad! Really bad!) (Wait! 13's digital root is... *blue shock* ...4.) Well, that is an odd link between two unlucky numbers...
'They looked around frantically, desperate to locate the source of the voice.'
(*ji...*) (Why are you staring at Santa?) (No reason.) [sarcasm] Right... [/sarcasm]
'At last they found it... A speaker set in the ceiling.'
???: I am [Zero]... The captain of this ship.
*shrug* For the heck of it, I'm starting a "This ship" counter... not counting this one use of it.
[This ship: 1]
Zero: I am also the person who invited you here.
It's not like these people had a choice to decline the aforementioned "invitation".
'The voice was harsh, obscured occasionally by the crackle of static...But Junpei recognized it. How could he have forgotten it? It was the same voice he had heard from the man in the gas mask.'
Silver: Hey! Asshole! What the hell is this?!
*LOL* (*sigh* Shimohi's still laughing over the thought of a psychic hedgehog saying those things...)
Silver: C'mon out here! I wanna get a look at you!
Lion: What do you mean to do to us?!
(I should be asking you the same thing...) Why are you looking at me like that? (You KNOW why!) (Huh... I don't remember seeing this person before.) (That's probably because that memory involves something you'd rather not remember.)
Zero: I mean to have you participate in a game. Some of you, I know, are familiar with this game.
Yeah. ([sarcasm] Tell me about it. [/sarcasm])
Zero: The [Nonary Game]. It is a game...where you will put your life on the line.
And so far our win count is... zero out of two.
Dancer: Nonary Game...?
Mountain: What the hell's that?!
'The voice continued, implacable.'
Zero: The rules of the [Nonary Game] can be found upon your persons. They are simple rules.
Not all of the rules. (Only Snake has all the rules written down.)
Zero: Read them.
Dancer: Nonary Game...?
Silver: Hey... There's something in my pocket... Check this out.
'Silver reached into his pocket, and pulled out a small slip of paper. The rest of them reached into their own pockets, and pulled out similar slips of paper. Junpei followed suit, and dug into the pocket of his pants.'
I know I didn't do this the previous two times, but the picture of Junpei's note can be read, kind of. I'll have to improvise at some parts...
("We will call them the [numbered doors]. The doors in front of you are a pair of the same. The key to opening these numbered doors are the [numbered bracelets] that each of you possess. Should you total the numbers of your [numbered bracelets] and find that the [digital root] of that number is equal to the number of that door, the door will open. Only those who have opened the door may pass through. There are, however, limits. Only [3-5] people can pass through the numbered door. All those who ender must leave and all who enter must contribute. The purpose of the game is simple. Leave this ship alive. It is hidden, but an exit can be found. Seek a way out...Seek a door that carries a [q].") (Is that a typo?) (What?) (It looks like you typed a lower-case "Q" instead of a "9"!) (Pansy! That was the closest equivalent I could find to the font used for that "nine"! Okay!) Also... [This ship: 2]
'He felt the tell-tale crumple of paper, slightly damp from his earlier ordeal.'
Junpei: Hey, I got one too!
Lion: Then it would seem Zero has seen fit to grace us each with a letter.
Except for us. Well, I'm assuming we have to rely on reading the letters of our point of view characters.
Lion: Would you mind terribly reading it to us, young man?
'His request had been delivered to Junpei who, after a short moment of surprise, did as he'd been asked.'
Junpei: On this ship, you will find a handful of doors emblazoned with numbers. We will call them the [numbered doors]. The doors in front of you are a pair of the same. The key to opening these numbered doors are the [numbered bracelets] that each of you possess. Should you total the numbers on your [numbered bracelets]...and find that the [digital root of that number is equal to the number of that door, the door will open. Only those who have opened the door may pass through. There are, however, limits. Only [3-5] people can pass through one numbered door. All those who enter must leave, and all who enter must contribute.
So far, that is a lot like what I thought that picture of the letter read. (Barring some misreading of certain small words.) Well played Aksys Games, well played...
'[Bracelet], Junpei figured, had to mean the bulky thing on his wrist. He glanced around. It looked like everyone else had one as well, and had come to much the same conclusion.'
Junpei: The purpose of the game is simple. Leave this ship alive. It is hidden, but an exit can be found. Seek a way out... Seek a door that carries a [9].
(Monster... THAT WAS A TYPO AFTER ALL!) No, that is seriously how it looked like in the picture! I can't stand the wailing of women... *slap* What are you doing!? Only what Tyrion would do. Also this, [This ship: 3]
'Junpei had reached the end of the letter. There was a long moment of silence, and then the speaker crackled to life once more.'
Then why were we hearing the speaking crackling the entire time Junpei was reading that? *sigh* You must be hearing things...
Zero: There is one last thing I must tell you. As you have no doubt surmised, this ship as begun to sink.
[This ship: 4]
Zero: On April 14th, 1912...the famous ocean liner Titanic crashed into an iceberg. After remaining afloat for 2 hours and 40 minutes, it sank beneath the waters of the North Atlantic. I will give you more time. [9 hours]. That is the time you will be given to make your escape.
'The voice finished, and the speaker went silent. The sound of a bell tolling echoed through the hall. It came from the dance hall adjacent to the stairwell. It took those assembled on the stairs mere moments to trace the sound to an antique clock embedded in the wall. 7...8...9... The sound of the 9th bell faded away. The 10th never came. That meant the time was 9 o'clock.'
(But is that 9 o'clock AM or PM?)
'Most likely 9 o'clock in the evening.'
You hear that you...! If you finish that with what I think you were going to say, you're going to "eat" a knuckle sandwich!
'When Junpei had peered out the window of his cell, he'd seen nothing but blackness. It had to be nighttime. If that was the case, then they would need to escape by [6 AM] the following day...'
(Assuming we're even on a sinking ship.) Of course we're on a sinking ship! I wouldn't be too sure about that, you'll soon see why...
Zero: Now, it is time. Let our game begin.
(Yes, Jigsaw...) You idiot! He just said his name's "Zero"! Dude, that was supposed to be a Saw reference.
Zero: I wish you all the best of luck.
"And may the odds be ever in your favor." And before we get any objections from the new guy, it's a Hunger Games quote.
'The speaker went silent, and did not speak again. Silver yelled at the speaker with language coarse enough to embarrass a sailor, but the rest of Junpei's companions were silent, deep in thought.'
Now I'm imagining all sorts of odd noises playing in the background, like dolphin chirps and fog horns or even the cawing of a crow.
'Junpei, too, was consumed by his thoughts. There was a great deal he didn't understand. Who was Zero...? What was the Nonary Game? Why had he chosen to make them part of it? Was he a criminal who took delight in playing with his victims? Or did he have some other purpose? And why had Junpei been chosen as part of this insane game? Why had any of them been chosen? But one question was foremost on his mind... Akane. They hadn't seen one another since elementry school. Why had she appeared now? Coincidence...? No. That seemed impossible. There had to be a reason. He didn't know what it might be, but... There had to be a reason.'
(I can't answer any of those questions without dropping some kind of spoiler, which will cause me to not be able to eat my favorite food!)
Lion: Very well!
'The lion's voice seemed oddly loud in the silence.'
Lion: Standing around here won't do us any good. Best we get moving, don't you think?
Junpei: ...Get moving?
Akane: Are you planning to open the numbered doors?
Well, that's kind of the point of this game.
Dancer: H-Hey! Wait! Don't tell me you're actually going to do what this...this Zero says?!
Lion: No, no, that's not what I mean.
'The lion shook his head, mildly annoyed.'
She just doesn't get it, does she...
Lion: I'm saying, let's find another way.
But... There isn't.
Lion: After all, we haven't really examined this place yet.
Dancer: We...what...?
'...'
This is just going to waste more of our time...
'...Their separate investigations finished, all 9 people returned to where they'd left one another. The result of all their work was...nothing.'
Ha! I was right all along!
'They were completely sealed in. Their hard work had not gone completely to waste, however. They had learned a number of things as they'd scoured the parts of the ship they could reach. It seemed that they were confined to decks A through C. C Deck was as far down as they would be able to go, however. The reason being... That D Deck was completely submerged. Strangely, however, the water had risen no higher than D Deck.'
(Strike one against the "on a sinking ship" theory!)
'The flow seemed to have been stopped somehow, as evidenced by the surface of the water on D Deck, which was as smooth as glass.'
(Yeah... Water on a sinking ship does not behave like that. Strike two!)
'The prince knelt down and gently drew his hand across it.'
Prince: Perhaps this Zero fellow has used some sort of remote control to seal a watertight door lower down...
Ha! Take that you stupid bitch! You know nothing! *punch* Did someone order a knuckle sandwich. Hey! I was just giving her what she deserved! Same here, asshole. *sigh* Fine, fine, I did not realise they were with you...
Prince: He said that our time limit was 9 hours.
Mountain: Then you're sayin' we won't sink 'til then?
Prince: Well, that may be a little too optimistic. No point to wishful thinking.
'There were 3 metal doors on C Deck. A single door stood off to the side, with 2 more on the wall facing the central staircase. None of them had numbers, or verification devices. They were, however, locked like the other doors. No matter how much they pushed and shoved, the doors refused to move. The mountain and the lion threw themselves against them a few times, but to no avail.'
Damn it! I could feel it whenever he did that! Why? I have no idea.
'The door in the back had a keyhole. Just above it was a strange mark in the shape of a circle surrounding a dot.'
The symbol for the Sun. And beyond... was here someone unknown to us tried to have me stabbed and drowned. I'd rather not have to go behind that door again...
'There were 2 other doors on C Deck as well, but it was clear they were elevators, as each of them had a button next to it with an upside-down triangle. They tried pushing the button. No response. Apparently there was no power running to the elevators. To the left of the elevator doors was a card reader. The card reader also had a strange mark on it. It looked like a lower-case "h" with a dash drawn across the upper stem of the "h".'
Saturn... Who's Sailor Scout is an apocalypse maiden. You're supposed to be a guy and you watch girl cartoons!? Yes, yes, I do. What are you going to do about it? [sarcasm] Turn me in to the masculinity police? [/sarcasm]
'Junpei stared at it for a while.'
Akane: This is the symbol of [Saturn]. It's an astrological symbol.
Junpei: Then...the mark on the other door...
Akane: I think that was the [Sun symbol].
'They had seen the same symbols on A Deck. There was a door on either side of the stairs. The one on the left had a key hole with a symbol engraved on it.'
Akane: This is an [Earth symbol]. The horizontal line symbolizes the equator and the vertical one represents the Prime Meridian.
'Junpei looked up at the ceiling. There was a great circle cut in it, perhaps for a skyling or a glass dome, but ut had been filled with a gargantuan metal plate.'
(And that would be not only strike three against the sinking ship theory, but also throws into question if it's actually evening. Those metal plates, and quite possibly an unlit tank of water, are very suspicious...)
'The metal looked very solid. Anything short of an explosive charge was unlikely to damage it. There were several windows along both sides of the ship--or at least there had been. They, too, were covered with metal plates. In other words...'
(We're fucked.)
Junpei: We're trapped. All the exits go nowhere...
'Junpei was not happy. The girl with pink hair spoke up.'
Pink hair: Well, I'm sure they go somewhere. We just can't open them.
'Then the mountain spoke.'
Mountain: You don't know that. For all we know, they just open into walls, or take us in circles.
'The prince did not agree.'
Prince: No, I'm sure they go somewhere. Otherwise, what point would there be?
When this happens in games, tabletop or otherwise, it's called "railroading". (Choo-choo!) That's number two-hundred and sixty-two, get the fuck out of here, NOW! Nope, I actually think that's funny.
Prince: And we can open them. Well, 2 of them, at least.
Junpei: You mean the numbered doors...
'All eyes turned towards the doors with numbers on them. The atmosphere in the room grew tense.'
Dancer: H-Hey... Wait a minute.
[simultaneously] What now!? What now!? [/simultaneously]
Dancer: I think I said this earlier, but I don't think we should do that.
'The dancer moved in front of the doors, as if to block them.'
Dancer: We'd have to be crazy to open these doors.
(Well, these two... *gesturing toward Shimohi and Akurei* ...are most definitely crazy.)
Dancer: If we do that, we're doing exactly what Zero wants us to do.
'Suddenly, everyone began to speak at once. "I agree!" "I don't! That's a terrible idea!"'
Shut up, whore! *punch*
'"We should keep going." "We should stay here!" "We don't have any other way to open any of these doors."'
(Let's get on with it, already!) (Two more for the reference jar.)
'"We should just wait. Someone's bound to come find us!"'
That statement couldn't be more wrong.
'"We don't have time for that!"'
(Indeed!)
'"In 8 and a half hours, this ship is going to sink!"'
[This ship: 5]
'The clamor of voices made it next to impossible to determine who was saying what. Their arguments grew more and more intense, until people were shouting and screaming at one another.'
Just like a "debate" on the Internet.
'Junpei had remained silent, but at last he could take no more.'
Junpei: Hey!
...Is for horses!
Junpei: Shut up!
'They fell silent, and all eyes turned to Junpei. He felt each stare burning into him, but he refused to flinch.'
Junpei: Before we try and decide where we're going to go, there's something else we oughta do.
Pink hair: What's that?
Junpei: We need to exchange information. We don't know anything about each other. I want to know who you guys are...
Oh, right... I just forgot in all this excitement. ([sarcasm] Right... [/sarcasm])
Junpei: Who you are, where you came from, why you ended up here... Don't tell me you aren't curious too...?
Well, curiosity did kill the cat... But satisfaction brought it back! *facepalm*
'They were silent.'
See, even they though what you said was stupid! Actually, it's a reaction to what Junpei said. They can't hear us at all.
'Some of them looked the other way, or bit their lip, or crossed their arms and stared at the ceiling. But one of them spoke up. It was Akane.'
Akane: I agree. I think Jumpy is right.
Mountain: Jumpy...?
*sigh* Akane, you and your big mouth...
Akane: Oh! I'm sorry. I'm talking about him... I just call him Jumpy.
No! Don't say...
Akane: His name is Junpei...
...it. Shit! (Now we'll never get to hear what Junpei's code name would've been!)
'She pointed toward Junpei.'
Akane: We're childhood friends. We went to the same elementary school...
Mountain: Wait! Stop! Don't tell us stuff we didn't ask you about!
Yeah! Are you trying to get everyone killed!? (Well, not...) Akurei! (Oops, sorry.) Oh, so you're name is Akurei? (You know bless well, who the heaven I am! Asshole!) Whoa! Akurei, we just met this guy! (No, this is the douchebag who stabbed you in the back!) I don't know what you're talking about, I never touched that knife.
Mountain: Zero's probably watchin' us right now. What're you gonna do if he's listenin' in?!
Akane: Would...that be bad...?
Of course, ya dumb broad! *punch* Are you going to punch me every time I call a woman out for being themselves!? If you insist on insisting that all women are like that, then... Yes.
Mountain: Hell yeah it would! We don't know how much that bastard knows about us. Maybe he just picked a bunch'a random people to kidnap.
(*LOL* That's a laugh!)
Mountain: If that is the case, then it'd be dangerous for us to let him know too much. If Zero knows who we are, he could go after our families.
(It is dangerous... But not because of Zero. Besides, even you don't know who you are!)
Mountain: Maybe he'd tell us he had 'em to get us to do stuff, you know?
Then again, Zero could just say that without actually having abducted our loved ones...
Akane: But...we still need to know what our names are... It's going to be hard to talk to each other if we don't have names.
Mountain: All right, then why don't we have code names?
I already know what they're going to be: Ichinomiya, Niels, Santa, Yotsuba, [no code name given], Murasaki, Seven, Yashiro, and [refused to pick a code name]. (Wrong language!) Right, they're actually: Ace, Snake, Santa, Clover, [still no code name given], June, Seven, Lotus, and [still refused to pick a code name]. (If only June hadn't given out Junpei's name, then maybe Junpei's code name could've been "Pentagram", as in a five-sided shape, or something.) How are YOU so sure those are going to be the code names!? Because I've played through this game twice in this LP before and four and a half times total. Do you want to do our usual bet of over nine-thousand Internets for it, of course you're going to lose that bet. "It's over nine-thousand" is an old meme and you should feel old and ugly for even thinking of using it! I'm just going to ignore that.
'To him, apparently, it seemed like the obvious solution.'
Akane: Code names?
Mountain: Yeah, we'll each pick somethin'. Like... I'll be [Seven].
Junpei: Seven? Why are you Seven?
'It seemed a fair question. The mountain stuck out his left arm.'
Mountain: 'Cause this bracelet number says (7).
Silver: Oh, I get it. Yeah, that's a good idea.
'He smirked.'
Silver: All right, I'm gonna be [Santa]. Any of you chumps know Japanese?
I do!
Silver: No?
See new guy, they can't hear anything we're saying.
Silver; Well, "san" means "3". So I'll be Santa. You know like Santa Claus. Fits don'tcha think?
I'm having a hard time imagining you as the Guardian of Wonder, well, except for the being a badass part.
Lion: Then your bracelet number...
Silver: Yeah, it's got a (3) on it. Good job, grandpa.
'Just like the mountain had done, Silver thrust out his left hand. Sure enough, the face of his bracelet read (3).'
Lion: Very well then. I'll go next, shall I? My bracelet number is (1). Given that, I think [Ace] seems appropriate.
Might as well properly introduce myself here. My name is Daemon Spearmeister.
Dancer: I'll be [Lotus], then. As I'm sure you all know, it has 8 petals. Which means, of course, that my bracelet number is... (8).
Prince: I would appreciate it if you would call me [Snake].
Wait, don't tell me this means you three are going to be doing stupid Metal Gear Solid gags... (Not me, just those two. *points to Shimohi then Akurei*)
Prince: My bracelet number is (2). Since Ace has chosen cards, then I choose dice--"snake-eyes", clearly. Which is particularly relevant, given that I am blind.
'Blind? Really?'
"Ya rly"! ("No way..." Wait, this is...way too goofy!) Aw man... (I though we could ring a Monty Python reference out of the Pansy.) Is that her...? (No! My name's Niyagi!) By now, the nicknames of "Monster" and "Pansy" are more like "Insults of Endearment" by now...
'He'd kept his eyes closed during their entire ordeal, which had suggested something strange, but to hear it said so casually... It was something of a surprise.'
Huh... I thought that maybe he was some kind of badass that didn't NEED to see... I don't see why he can't be both.
'Everyone seemed a little nervous at the prince's proclamation, but no one seemed to know how to react to it. There was one person, however, who didn't seem to be surprised in the least. The girl with pink hair.'
That's because she's Snake's younger sister. No way!
Pink hair: I want to be [Clover]. You know, like a 4-leaf clover...
"...that I overlooked before!" What!? (*sigh* Sometimes Shimohi and Akurei start singing at seemingly random times as part of a musical reference.) (I like this version better, "I'm overlooking, my dead dog Rover, that I overlooked before!") (Yeah... She's a Monster all right...)
Pink hair: Good luck, right?
Not in the first playthrough...
'Looking almost bored, she held out her left hand. The face of her bracelet showed the number (4). They'd come around to Junpei. He held out his bracelet...'
Here it comes...
Junpei: All right, my number's (5), so my code name is gonna be--
Dancer: Why have one? It's not like there's any point to it now.
'The dancer cut him off in mid-sentence.'
We can see that.
Dancer: I mean... We all know your name already. You're Junpei.
Lotus, did you have to remind us of the fact that we'll never get to hear Junpei's code name idea?! Speaking of names, yours would be...? Oh right. I'm Shimohi Kagami. Are you some kind of weeaboo or something!? Dude, I'm an otaku! Well, by the American definition anyway. (*notices link* I won't click on the link in Daemon's dialouge if you know what's good for you.) It's pretty much the wikipedia for trolls...
Junpei: O-Oh...
'They all nodded. Akane stepped forward, nervously.'
Akane: Then you should all call me by my name too.
No! No, no, no! That's a bad idea! (Someone here will then really want you dead!)
Akane: Because...I mean... It doesn't seem...
Mountain: It doesn't seem fair to "Jumpy"?
Silver: You're thinking it's not cool for you to hide your name after you told us his?
Akane: ...
Yeah, they hit the proverbial nail on the head.
'Akane fidgeted awkwardly. Junpei decided he had to do something.'
Indeed, do something!
Junpei: What's your bracelet number?
Akane: It's (6)...
'She hesitated for a moment, then held out her left hand.'
(Well, the difference between a digital "6" and a "0" is just one displaced segment. And as for "3" and "9" that just a difference of one segment.) Akurei... (What!? No! I just felt like dropping some random trivia! I don't want to lose my nachoes before I even get the topping!)
'As she'd claimed, the bracelet's face showed a (6).'
Huh? Nachos? (Trust me Daemon, you don't want to know...) Or, more accurately, "if we told you, you'd wish we didn't."
'Junpei looked at it for a moment and thought.'
Junpei: All right then... Why don't we call you [June]?
Lion: June?
Junpei: Yeah, you know... It's the 6th month of the year. So you're [June].
Akane: Jumpy...
'He smiled back at her, reassuringly.'
Junpei: Are you good with that?
'Their names decided, Junpei ran over them quickly in his head. (1) was [Ace]. (2) was [Snake]. (3) was [Santa]. (4) was [Clover]. (5) was [Junpei's] number. Akane was (6), and Junpei had given her the code name of [June]. (7) was [Seven].'
(Duh!)
'And (8) was [Lotus]. That meant that 8 of them, including Junpei, had revealed their bracelet numbers. But there was still 1 person left... He was the man with glasses and hair like a bird's nest. He hadn't said anything since they'd met on the stairs, and he didn't look like the sort of person who was inclined to conversation. His skin was pale, his breathing was heavy, and he was soaked with nervous sweat.'
Like some pathetic basement dweller!
'His behavior seemed very suspicious, or perhaps simply emotionally unstable. It was difficult to tell. Whatever the case, it seemed clear that he had only a fingertip's-worth of a grip on his sanity.'
Can we see his Call of Cthulhu character sheet?
'The girl with pink hair, [Clover], walked up to him, slowly. She put her hands on her hips and eyed him suspiciously.'
Clover: What number are you?
'He didn't answer.'
Damn retard... *punch* What was...!? "That" was for using an ableist slur like that.
'His bloodshot eyes twitched from person to person, and his breath came in hot pants.'
Clover: Hey, I'm talking to you...
'The man licked his dry lips with a shaking tongue and spoke with a voice like old paper.'
Okay, now he's starting to sound a bit creepy...
???: I-I-Isn't it o-obvious? There are 9 people here. A-A-A-And you know who numbers 1 through 8 are. I'm th-the only one left.
Clover: So you're (9)?
???: Y-Y-Y-Yeah.
'He extended a trembling arm. The bracelet did indeed say (9). Clover looked at it contemptuously.'
Clover: What's your code name?
???: C-C-C-Code...n-name?
Yeah, that's what she said. (*LOL*) Shut up, bitch! *punch*
Clover: What do you want us to call you? We all made up names. You should too.
???: I-I-I-I-I d-don't need one.
Clover: Why not?
???: B-B-B-Because I'm n-n-not going to stay here. ...With y-you.
I still think that wording's a bit strange...
'He took a shuddering breath and exhaled. Clover looked at him with something very like disgust.'
Clover: You've got some sorta plan?
???: I-I do.
Clover: Yeah? What's that?
???: Y-Y-Y-You sure you w-want to know?
Right now my brain is going to some very bad places... (Even though you know what his plan is?) Yeah...
Clover: Yeah...?
???: A-All right. Let me sh-show you.
(I've seen enough hentai to know where this is going.) But we know it's NOT that. (Yeah, yeah...)
???: I-I-I-I'm going to do this!
Clover: Aaaaiiiii!
'By the time they realized what he was doing, it was too late to stop him. The man's body moved like a snake's.'
(Hopefully not one of the trouser variety, if you know what I mean.) (Monster! W-What in the world do you think you're doing!? And, oh yeah, more money for the reference jar.)
'In the blink of an eye, he had slid around behind her, and wrapped his arm around her waist.'
Santa: Hey, what the hell do you think you're doing!?
'Silver--[Santa] leapt forward, toward Clover and the 9th Man. He was halfway there, when--'
???: S-Stay back!
'Suddenly the man's hand dove into his pocket. It came back out with a knife. A pocketknife.'
(So THAT'S where Ace got that...) Got what? (You know bless well what I'm talking about!)
'He held it to Clover's pale, quivering neck.'
???: I-I-If you g-get any closer--! I-I'll cut her open!
'Santa skidded to a halt. He snarled at the scrawny man with the knife and gritted his teeth.'
???: Y-Yes, that's right...
'The man's smile was neither friendly nor reassuring. Sweat poured down his neck, soaking the collar of his shirt.'
Snake: Clover...are you all right?
'The prince--[Snake's] voice sounded oddly concerned.'
I don't think that his reaction is odd at all. He can't see what's going on, kind of like when you can only hear what's going on in a TV show but not actually see it... (Like if you end up washing dishes at your grandmothers house?) Yeah... like that.
Clover: Y-Yeah... I'm fine...
(For now.)
'Her voice shook, making her words even less convincing.'
Junpei: What the hell are you trying to do?!
(Get me my favorite nacho topping.) I still don't... (Trust us...) ...it'll most likely gross you out at best... (...and prove just how much of a Complete Monster...well... "The" Monster actually is.)
???: I-I told you... This is my plan...
Seven: What're you gonna do to her, you sick son of a bitch?
(Well, if you two are right, someone's going to be sick here...)
???: D-Don't worry... I-I'm not going to d-do anything to her...
Yeah, I'm going to take good care of her! Dude, that sounds extremely creepy coming from you.
???: If she just does what I t-tell her to, I'll let her go.
'He started to move backward, slowly, keeping his grip on Clover. Keeping their distance, Junpei and the others followed. Eventually, the man reached the wall. He gave a start as his back touched it, then glanced around quickly and spoke.'
???: V-V-Verify...
Clover: Huh?
???: The left. Look on your left. D-Do you see the device on the wall? P-Place your hand on the scanner panel, the round part.
Clover: What if I don't?
Isn't it obvious, then he's going to have to kill a bit... *punch* What the hell is it with you and punching me!? [sarcasm] I don't know, maybe I have this strange compulsion that compels me to punch complete assholes. [/sarcasm]
'The man's nostrils flared and he looked like he was about to choke.'
???: A-A-A-Are you an idiot?! W-W-What do you think?! I c-c-could slit your throat right now! I'll kill you if I have to. A-All I need is your bracelet.
Clover: ...
???: Just do it! D-Do it now!
'He pressed the knife against Clover's neck, hard. Slowly, she stretched her left hand out toward the device. Her back was to it, and she had to feel around for a moment before she found the circular panel. It made a cold, electronic noise, and on the display above her hand, an asterisk appeared. So that's how it works, Junpei thought to himself. By placing one's palm on what the 9th Man had called the "scanner panel", the user's bracelet number would be entered into the device.'
Flashback time!
Zero: "Should you total the numbers on your [numbered bracelets]...and find that the [digital root of that number is equal tot he number of that door, the door will open."
Wait a minute... *looks up* Junpei actually read that off of Zero's note, rather than Zero actually reading that out loud... (Most likely a overlooked holdover from the original Japanese version.) Well, I'm still calling shenanigans on this! NERD!!!
'Junpei shifted his eyes to the door itself. The number on it was [5]. The 9th Man seemed to know a little more about the device's operation than he should.'
(So do several other people here, they're just playing dumb.)
'How had he known exactly what to do?'
???: Good... Good, you're done. N-N-ext...
'His blood-shot eyes crept from person to person until finally... They stopped on the lion--[Ace].'
*gulp*
???: You, right? You're the one with the number (1) bracelet, right?
Ace: Yes. I am. So?
???: Th-Then y-you're next... Just verify your number like this little b-brat did.
Ace: ...
???: What are you doing?! D-Do it! D-Don't you care what h-happens to her?!
Nope.
Ace: O-Okay, okay. Just calm down...
'Ace held up his hands, palms out. The 9th Man jerked his chin toward the device. Slowly, cautiously, Ace moved toward the device. After what seemed like an agonizing eternity, he reached it.'
???: Now... Verify.
'Ace nodded and placed his hand on the scanner panel. The device beeped again, and a 2nd asterisk appeared. Now the device had Clover and Ace's numbers. (4) and (1).'
Let's see... one plus four plus nine equals fourteen. One plus four equals five. It works! What kind of stupid math is that!? *sigh* That was the digital root of one, four, and nine. Didn't you pay attention while you were with Ace in his cabin? (I wouldn't be too surprised if he ignored it because digital roots are also involved in "numerology".) Speaking of which... *looks up* The "digital root" of your given name is "7", your family name is "4". But you're given and family name combined is one of two odd exceptions to the usual numerology rules... "11". (The other odd exception is "22".) My own number is "6" while Akurei and Niyagi's are both 11. (Didn't you already do a numerology-based post and declare your number to be "9"?) That's just for my "given" name. (Which is more of a favored "gaming handle" anyway.) Indeed, all I'll say about my full legal name is that it's digital root is "5".
'4 + 1 = 5'
Well, of course four plus one equals five! What are you a complete... Before you can finish that with a certain ableist slur I think you are, I must point out that that's what the game itself is saying. I'm just reporting it.
'The same as the number written on the door. But it wouldn't open just yet...'
Yet another flashback line...
Zero: "Only [3-5] people can pass through one numbered door."
Still insisting that Zero read this out loud instead of Junpei... (*ding*)
'The door needed at least 1 more person. Who would that be?'
(Mr. Future nacho topping!) What!? (It's coming...)
???: G-G-G-Get back...
'His voice shook, but the knife he held to Clover's throat made his words a command. Ace took 2, then 3, steps back.'
???: No! Farther! More than that! Go all the way back!
(Man, he REALLY wants to become nacho dip.) Wait, are you implying that your nachos are topped with human remains somehow!? (Well, I'm a humanitarian.) That's a relief. (No, it isn't.)
'Slowly, Ace did what he was told. The 9th Man's lips curled into a cruel, twisted smile.'
(Well, of course someone who'd be twisted enough to... Right. Spoilers.) And this is coming from the demon who's favorite food is "Unholy Nachos".
'That was when Junpei understood his plan. Clover's (4) and Ace's (1)... Added to the 9th Man's (9)...'
Equals "five". You...! In digital root calculations!
'4 + 1 + 9 = 14 [insert arrow here] 1 + 4 = [5]'
See...
'In other words...'
???: Hehe... Hehehe... Ehehehehehehehehe! Th-Th-Thank God you were all so c-cooperative! Now I can get out of this n-nightmare!
More like "out of this proverbial frying pan and into the fires of Hell".
'He pressed his own hand against the scanner panel. A 3rd asterisk appeared on the screen. He dropped his hand to the lever on the side of the device and pulled.'
(Looks like my dip is getting cooked soon... *pulls out bucket of warm but otherwise plain nachos from hammer space*) Where did she get that? (I'm a demon, the laws of physics, or realtiy for that matter, apply to me.) Just the rules of cool, drama, and funny.
'The door opened with a heavy, metallic groan. He let go of Clover.'
Junpei: Wait!
It's a... Oh never mind...
'Junpei leapt toward the 9th Man, but he wasn't fast enough. The man shoved Clover...'
Clover: Aaah!
'...And hopped through the door.'
???: O-O-Okay, have a good one, guys.
(Oh, I'll have some awesome nachos alright! Time to close the oven door...) Is she joking? We... (...wish.)
???: I'm going off ahead now. Well then... Goodbye...
(Forever!)
'He raised his hand and waved, a twisted smirk on his face.'
(Oh, he's going to be screaming soon...)
'Then he was gone. The door ground shut with a dull clang of metal on metal.'
(Tick-tock goes the oven timer, just near eighty more seconds...)
Snake: Clover! Are you all right?
'Snake ran to Clover's side as she lay on the floor.'
Clover: Y-Yeah, I'm fine.
'She climbed unsteadily to her feet, and once there, leaned heavily on Snake's shoulder for support. Junpei ran to the door.'
(Got to check on it, I can't wait!)
'The others followed him. Several pairs of hands grabbed hold of the handles and pulled. They grunted and strained, but...'
Absolutely nothing happened.
Junpei: Shit! it won't budge!
'That was when [Lotus], the dancer, spoke. Her voice was quiet.'
Lotus: Do you hear something...?
Junpei: Like...what?
Lotus: Like some sort of...beeping...
(Ah, the would be the aforementioned oven timer.) No, you just call it an oven timer at this one specific point in the story.
'Junpei pressed his ear against the cold metal of the door. The others did the same.'
June: You're right... I can hear it too.
Santa: What is it?
'Then they heard something else.'
(The 9th Man screaming like a little girl.) Akurei... (Would "a little kid" be better?) Much, thank you.
'It was the 9th Man.'
???: Shit! Why isn't it stopping?! Goddamnit! Y-Y-You l-lied!
'Lied...?'
(Yeah, you know what I'm talking about.) No, I don't. (And, ladies and germs, we have another liar in the house!)
???: Th-Th-This wasn't supposed to happen! This is wrong! This is wrong!
(And now you're going to become nacho dip.)
'His voice shook with fear. Safe on the outside, they stepped back from the door and looked at one another.'
Ace: What is happening in there...?
(Liar, liar, pants on fire...)
???: O-O-O-Open the door!
Even if we could, I wouldn't. (Because even Shimohi here knows what you did!)
???: Please! I'm begging you! Help me! Please, get me out of here!
Hey! Do something! Like I said, we can't! The door won't open 'till... Well, you'll find out. And even if we could, he's just getting his just desserts.
???: Get me out of here!
'Junpei grabbed hold of the device. He slammed his hand on the scanner panel. Nothing happened. why didn't it register him?! He looked at the display where the asterisks had shown up. It said "ENGAGED".'
???: A-Ah... Oh my God, oh my God, there's no time left...! Listen! I was lied to! He lied to me! He put me in here! It was him! He killed me! It was him! A...Aahh... Aaahhhh...
Hit the deck and cover your ears! What!?
???: Gyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh...
'... ...The explosion rocked the room.'
*jumps* *flinch* Dang, even hearing that for the fifth time doesn't seem to help...
'Instinctively, they ducked, then stood up slowly when they realized there was no danger. No one spoke. Silence filled the room. In that silence, the electronic tone that echoed across the room sounded as loud as a gunshot. All eyes turned toward it. It had come from the device mounted next to the door. The display changed from [ENGAGED] to [VACANT].'
Seven: Let's see if we can open it...
'[Seven]--the mountain--swallowed hard. Junpei nodded and placed his hand on the scanner panel. A red asterisk appeared on the LCD panel. The device had registered Junpei's bracelet number: (5). He was not enough, however. At least 2 more people were needed. Junpei asked...'
<<Which pair?>>
-Ace and Lotus (1+8)-
-Snake and Seven (2+7)-
-Santa and June (3+6)-
(Well, for...) *ji...* (...one of those pairs, it's actually "nine plus zero".) Well, there's only one choice we haven't gone with yet, and one half of that pair's the point of view character for the new guy, Daemon. So...
Junpei: Ace, Lotus... You think you could give me a hand here?
*facepalm* That's the dumbest joke ever! (Hey! That's supposed to be the Pansy's stick!)
'The pun was a little too on-the-nose, but the mood was still grim. Both Ace and Lotus lifted their left hands silently. He verified, and she followed suit.'
'5 + 1 + 8 = 14 [insert arrow here] 1 + 4 = [5]'
'They'd fulfilled the conditions. If they were to pull the lever on the side...'
Junpei: Are you guys ready? I'm gonna open it.
'Junpei grabbed the lever and looked back over his shoulder. They stiffened and nodded. Junpei nodded back, and set his mouth in a grim line. The he slowly... lowered... the lever... There was a metallic groan, and the door slid open. A breath of air drifted out of it, carrying a stench that nearly made them gag.'
(Actually, that smells tasty!) What!? Are you nuts!? (No, I'm a demon. Shimohi's the one with the family tree full of nuts.)
'Junpei grimaced and put a hand over his mouth.'
(Now, if you excuse me, I have nacho dip to collect...)
Lotus: Oh my God...
Ace: Good God...
On second thought, a good God wouldn't allow something like this to happen.
'Lotus and Ace shuddered. Seven grunted.'
Seven: Whoa... That's...pretty bad...
'Even Santa's voice shook.'
Santa: He...he blew up...
Quite literally.
'It appeared that Santa was right. The hallway on the other side of the door was splattered with chunks of torn flesh and dark, red blood.'
June: Aaaaiiiii!
(Nice scare cord there. *goes back to gathering "nacho dip"*)
'The shriek echoed across the room. It had come from June. Then her strength left her and she dropped-- As Junpei turned to catch her, the door groaned shut.'
(Excuse me, demon coming through!)
'She crumpled to the floor.'
Junpei: June! You okay?!
'Junpei dropped to his knees and put his arm around her shoulders. That was when he noticed... Her whole body was feverish. She was radiating intense heat...'
(Yeah... This still isn't going to end well... *munch* *crunch*) Wait! You're saying that what looks like "chunky salsa" is actual human remains, that wasn't a joke!? (That's what we ment by, "You don't want to know.")
Junpei: What the hell?! Where'd this fever come from?
June: ...
'June didn't answer. Her face looked like wax, and her whole body began to shake.'
Junpei: All right, let's just rest for a minute, okay?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And, once again, Junpei's just given us the perfect excuse to call this post for a day. Next time, which door will we go through next? We've been in behind both doors five and four before. (But we'll probably skip actually going though that door if there's nothing new we can add.) (But we still have to upkeep the reference jar.)
Monty Python Reference Jar
Akurei: $30
Shimohi: $13
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