OK, this is it! I'd not only pre-ordered this game, but I paid for it 100% before it came out; and now it has! Let's see what this latest entry in the mainline Shin Megami Tensei franchise has in store for me...
And, yes, I've played some kind of MegaTen game (even if unofficial) before. Although there isn't a First Impressions post for this anime, believe me; I greatly anticipated the premiere of the first episode of Devil Survivor 2: The Animation for a reason. And I've also played most of the Persona games along with the first Devil Survivor game and Devil Summoner: Soul Hackers.
(Note: This is turning out like an After Action Report.)
OK, where's the opening sequence (or the video game equivalent of an animes opening theme)? That was part of the fun in playing the other MegaTen games to me!
What is with this opening cut scene? It sounds like I'm hearing a spoken version of The End Poem from Minecraft.
"Who are you...? State your name!" Of course, this is the 'insert name here' Shrodingers question for our hero (in the ancient Greek sense of the term). Default name "Flynn" (Like "Eril Flynn"?) but, I'll just use my usual video game handle..."Shimohi"! (Who didn't see that coming from a mile away)
Yeah, yeah, mysterious voice, this is a MegaTen game, of course our choices influence the world! That's par for the proverbial course in this series!
Oh great! A burning ruined city in a post-apocalyptic setting, also normal for a MegaTen game.
A strange machine-like voice is calling me and I see a bright light among the ruins, normally the advice is to NOT go towards the light (LOL).
Now it says it can finally take shape, what?
"I was fighting damn hard when I waited for you to show up." OK, what is this? A vision? A dream?
"You do remember me, right?" No, this is the first time I've ever played this particular game!
"That's right..." ...you're not listening to a word I'm saying.
"I'm Walter. Whatever happens after this, you'd better not forget me." OK, give me a 'reason' to remember you.
"Because you and me are going to make a world where anything can be changed if you have the will..." sounds OK so far, but that depends on what kind of change...
"...Thank goodness you're here." [sarcasm] Great, another mysterious voice. [/sarcasm]
"Please, come quick." Why? Now I'm in a red desert landscape with blinding white skies and a red statues head half sunken in the sand...and another bright light, and I can't believe I'm going towards this one as well. This had better not be the border between life and death!
"Good, you've come. Now I can take shape too..." This is like that Walter dude...
"I prayed and waited...longing for the day you'd come." To quote Simon and Lewis of the Yogscast, "I beg your pardon?"
"You remember who I am, right?" Do I have to repeat what I said to 'Walter'?
"Yes, that's right..." you listen to others as much as Walter?
"My name is Jonathan. You mustn't forget that my future is with you." Who died and declared you the next Yahweh? (Never did like him [Yahweh] anyway.)
"The two of us are going to make a world where the peace we know today lasts forever..." ...but at what cost? Freedom or even Free-will?
"I...revive...every...sake..." WOAH! CREEPY LITTLE GIRL ALERT! If I was playing this in the dark with the volume up at max, this could be a screamer!
"Please Shimohi, won't you revive me...?" OK, still a bit static-y but at least understandable this time. (No, the voice over didn't actually use the hero's name, it left that part out; as usual) Wait, could this be the goddess to be reincarnated? Moving on...
Alright, now a pan out away from a walled city to a Ghibli hills landscape outside, so this is what the world will look like once the Titans are finally extinct.
"Hoy...Hoy, wake up." My name isn't 'Hoy', hoy is for horses. Or is that 'hay'? (LOL) "If we're not on our way soon, we'll be late." For what, the chicken festival? (LMAO)
"Are you awake? I admit, I fell asleep too..." ...and who the crap are you again?
"We've spent so many days out here at Lake Mikado, after all..." ...doing what? Trying to find Nessy? (Wrong body of water!)
"When I thought about this being our last nap here, I couldn't bear to rouse myself." I know change is good but, you're almost making it sound like a death sentence. WHAT DID WE DO!?
"So I don't want to hear, 'You promised to wake me up, Issachar!" eh?" Oh, so NOW we get to know your freaking name!
"Drat, but now's not the time to argue. We must hurry to the Gauntlet Rite." [sarcasm] Great, we have to go through a Most Extreme Elimination Challenge. [/sarcasm] (Yes, I know what he really meant, I just ignored that for rule of funny.)
> Shimohi arrived in the castle town with Issachar.
"...Here at last. It's such a long trip from the village. The city is so big, I don't think I could even hazard a guess as to where they might hold the Rite..." Oh, how about we start with 'where there's a boat-load of people gathering?' or a large clearing like a town square, that's likely to be 'built' for these kind of events? So Issachar asks a random guy off the street...
"What is it?" Oh-no, it's a nobleman (or at least looks and sounds like one), it could be 'off with our heads' for this...
"Well..Us two...We have come for the Rite and..." [sarcasm] Nice job sounding like you know what you're doing. [/sarcasm]
"Hmph. A Casualry brat." Yeap, a stuck-up nobleman for sure.
"The Gauntlet Rite, you say...?" I bet you he'll give us [Issachar and I] bad directions just to mess with us.
"Seek it yourself." Close, but no dice.
"Though you may as well begin preparing now for your journey home, hahaha..." Damn it, you didn't have to be so mean about it if you didn't know!
"Um...Thank you...? Seems the tales I'd heard of the Luxurors' snoot undershot the mark..." [sarcasm] You don't say, Issachar...[/sarcasm] Welcome to the real world. *sigh*
"But no matter, we'll find someone else to ask." That's the spirit! Not everyone in this city can be such an asshole...right?
> Shimohi goes to Casualry District 2 and talks to the Talkative Woman...
"If you become a Blessed Samurai, you'll be counted as a Luxuror too! What a boon that must be!" Not if I have to act like that jackass back there. "Though I'm satisfied being a Casualry, myself. It's the station in life God has given me." So...you're pretty much an insect. That was meant to be a reference to Head Maid from Maoyuu; but, I can see how this can be viewed as hypocritical humor.
Now the Craftsman...
"Today's that ceremony, right? That means there'll be a whole mob of people coming to Mikado Castle...I'd best pick up the pace on my work, shouldn't I?" OK, that's for the help sir! "Ah well. I'm not paid to use my brain. The Luxuror can do the thinking for me." ...so you're an insect too! *sigh*
How about this Innocent man over there?
"Anyone who comes of age at 18 must undergo the ceremony at Mikado Castle." Well, there's a second opinion of where to go, hurray...? "I was born and raised here, so it was a short trip for me. But it must be a chore for those who live very far away." Well, there's hope for this dude.
> Shimohi goes to Luxuror District 2 and talks to the Gentle woman...
"I was born a Luxuror. My unborn child will be a Luxuror. As will all his descendants..." OK, lady, you're assuming a lot of things here. A) That we care if you're pregnant or not. B) That you're kid will live long enough to have kids, and last but not least C) That said kid will be a boy. Besides, what does all that have to do with where the Rite is going to be held anyway?
"In the Eastern Kindgom of Mikado, we are all born to a purpose that God has given us, unto our last descendant." [sarcasm] Great, even the nobility are insects. [/sarcasm]
Three guesses to if this Arrogant man will be of any help, the first two don't count.
"What was this year in the Gregorian Calendar...? What year was it...?" You know those two guys back in Casualry District 2 were much more helpful that you two. "I met my wife for the first time in...Ah! It must be 1492 by the Gregorian Calendar now..." Dude, we don't care about your wife or when you two met.
> Shimohi checks out Luxuror District 1 (where, it seems, "...the Samurai and the King's other servants, as well as the monks, live.") and sees what the Loud woman is ranting about...
"There haven't been any new Samurai for years now." Maybe the difficulty of the course should be lowered just a little bit. "I wonder if the Gauntlets will accept anyone this year..." Wait, what? Are you actually talking about a piece of armor? That chooses their wielders like a Keyblade? This place is weird...let's see what this Slant-eyed man has to say...
"Is this your first time in the castle town? You're here for the Rite, aren't you...?" Actually, yes, are you rich-types actually going to be helpful for once? "It's Aquila Statue Plaza where you want to be. You can feel the kingdom's rich history all around you there." So, it seems to be a 'Aquila Statue Plaza at Mikado Castle', got it! Does this Quiet man over there have anything to add?
"Ah, are you lost? This is a residential area for we Luxurors." OK, I've got that already. "Of all the lands of the Eastern Kingdom of Mikado, we Luxurors only live inside this castle." As opposed to the Western Kingdom of...what? Also, the castle town itself is pretty much Wall Sina. "I won't forbid you to come here exactly, but...I would certainly prefer you to keep to the town's unwritten rules." Which are...what exactly? Let's GTFO before we get arrested for breaking a rule out of ignorance.
> Shimohi goes to Mikado Castle...and there's Aquila Statue Plaza...but there's another plaza there, let's go ask around the first and third Casualry Districts...and I'm stuck. Hopefully I'm not screwed...
> Shimohi goes to the Aquila Statue Plaza...
"...Hm? There's a crowd at the plaza. Could this be where the Rite is to take place...?" Let's hope that Slant-eyed man didn't steer us wrong, Issachar. "Hoy, Shimohi. Should we have a closer look? Well...?" Why not...
"Let's go and see."
> The youth are forming a queue...
"Those who have come for the Gauntlet Rite, form up here." So the Slant-eyed man did give us useful advice, I was correct in that not everyone here's an asshole! "You must abide until your turn." Who's up for a game of Shiritori while we wait?
"This is it...We're finally here. (Hey)...Do you know, I heard a curious thing from the elders at our village." Here comes the infallible babble... "Those who pass the Rite and become Samurai must live in Mikado Castle." Wasn't this shown in one of Atlus's preview videos? "As I heard it, they can't even go back to their hometown, unless it's for a mission. This could be farewell for us, Shimohi..." So, Mikado Castle's a gilded cage, got it.
> A young man is walking out of the plaza, having completed the Rite.
"Those who fail must leave at once." Says the samurai dude in...oh, I get it.
"The Gauntlet didn't shine for me." Yeah...that's being Unchosen for you. "I know this Rite is a dog and pony show, but the kingdom says to do it, so I go along." And another insect walks by.
> The disconsolate young man left Aquila Statue Plaza...
"I will become a Samurai...I definitely going to be a Samurai...A Samurai and a Luxuror at that." Okie-dokie-loki, if you want to live in a gilded cage surrounded by asshats, fine with me; I don't care if I pass or not (yes, I know what'll happen), I just prefer to not live in a gilded cage. That's all.
"Next candidate, step forth."
"That's my cue. Here I go to become a Samurai! Just know, Shimohi...you'll always be my friend." I can only hope, and same here, good luck.
> Issachar proceeded to the center of the plaza.
> After some time...
"Next candidate, come forth! I'm talking to you there. Hurry up and head to the square." Huh? Me? Maybe there's still a chance that we can hang out and work together.
> Shimohi walked over to the center of the plaza...
"Oh... ..."
> Issachar walked away wistfully.
"What's the matter? It's your turn next, isn't it?" Hey! A friend of mine failed an important test, can't I have a second or two to greive? "Go on."
"Welcome, young man." OK, Mr. Monk (no relation to the defective detective) "Will the Gauntlet choose you to be a Samurai...?" Maybe, maybe not? That's what this test is for. "Let us begin the Rite." Indeed. "Present to me your left arm." OK, that's my dominat hand, Just so you know; let's just get this over with. *extends left arm*
> The monk gently affixed a Gauntlet to Shimohi's arm...
HOLY SHIT!
"... o God Almighty..." Can you shut up about Yahweh already! "If this young man in my sight is to receive the gift of becoming a Samurai..." If said 'gift' is from Yahweh..."Please bestow Your light upon this mystic gauntlet." ...that's got to be a form of cosmic irony. *sigh* "Now, young man, touch the Gauntlet."
Are people pointing guns at me? It sure sounds like it.
"Congratulations, Shimohi. You are now a Samurai." ... "Sir Hope, please show Shimohi to the residence hall. ...I am sorry? Do you not understand that I am here on Abbot Hugo's behalf?"
"There is no need to cross. I have heard you." Yeah, I'm still in a 'state' of shock over how I'm going to be a slave of the 'state' (Why do you resort to incredibly lame puns like this?) "Follow me." [sarcasm] Yes, master. [/sarcasm]
"Why...!?" Issachar... I'm sorry, buddy, I'm so sorry.
> Shimohi followed Hope out of the plaza...
"I am Hope; head of the Samurai." Yeah, kind of figured that out myself. "From today on, you will dwell in this room." Are pets allowed, sir? "As a member of our band, you will work on the behalf of this kingdom alongside the rest of we Samurai." You've got a copy of Rock Band? Awesome! "Though you've jest been inducted, your practical training will begin tomorrow morning." Better than being stuck in here. "I suggest you rest early tonight to recover from your journey. You'll get more details tomorrow." [sarcasm] Great...now I get to wake up at four in the fucking morning. [/sarcasm]
> Hope left your room.
More like my cell...
> Shimohi decided to retire to bed early.
It's not like they're just going to let me wander the place to explore...
> His mind was a whirlwind of thoughts...
Like, "Why me...?"...
> About his life until now...His family and friends...
Who I'm likely to never see again...
> Uncertainly regarding the new life suddenly thrust upon him...The high expectations...
...and how far I'm going to fall off the pedestal once they realize I'm no sheep...
> But soon, Shimohi sunk into slumber...
Too...tired...from...raging against the heavens...
> The next morning...
"Oh, were you still asleep? Don't mind me barging in." Actually, I do mind...PERVERT! "Hah, I'm no burglar, if that's what you're thinking. I'm a bona fide Samurai." ...who doesn't listen to other people. *sigh* "I became one yesterday, just as you did, heh." OK, are we room mates or something, besides, who the crap are you? "My name's Walter. I heard that you came from the Casualries too." Huh, this might sound strange but, was I in any dream of yours... "That's why I came to introduce myself. It's good to meet you, Shimohi." ...oh, well, you seem like a cool guy so far. "By the by...have we met somewhere before?"
"Possibly..." So that 'was'...
"No, of course we haven't." Reality! Make up your mind! "That was only a dream...I'm imagining things. Pay me no mind." I'm not sure it's that much of a coincidence if both of us have the same dream. "You're heading to the practical training too, right?" Yeah, why you ask? "I'll go on ahead, then, and I'll see you at the entrance to Naraku." What does this have to to with an InuYasha villain?
> Shimohi Goes to the Naraku
> Other new Samurai recruits are gathered in the Aquila Statue Plaza.
"What's this I see? Are you a prentice Samurai too?" Dude, I don't think 'apprentice' is supposed to be pronounced like that.
"Yes, but look who's talking...Come to that, who are you?" What Walter said.
"I am Navarre! NAVARRE! This marks the third time I've said as much!" Dude, you're not important enough to be a household name. Get over yourself! "Let's see...Walter, I presume? You two are our last arrivals. It seems Casualries tend to be dawdlers. I find this cause for some concern. Don't you think so, Jonathan?" You're the other guy I saw in that dream! You're with this asshat!?
"Navarre...I believe that's enough. We're all prentices here, after all." So, you're actually a decent guy, but you still mispronounced 'apprentices'. *sigh*
"You're going to give him a bad impression of us Luxurors." Too late, miss...miss what's-your-name?
"What!? That's rather cutting of you, isn't it, Isabeau!?" Cutting? Maybe, but at least Isabeau is accurate. (Now it's verbal combat puns...)
"Huh. You may be a Luxuror, but I think we'll get along fine." Took the words right out of my mouth, Walter.
"I don't know about that...You've been quiet, though." Wait, was I doing the exact opposite of thinking out loud?
> Isabeau addressed Shimohi.
"My name is Isabeau. What's yours?"
"My name is Shimohi, pleased to meet you."
"Hm...? Shimohi...? That's the name from my dream...Sorry, never mind me." [sarcasm] Great, now I've shared a dream with two people. [/sarcasm] It's like I've had a subconscious threesome...(Get your mind out of the gutter!) "Interesting...I am Jonathan. I look forward to working alongside you, my fellow prentice." Aw, come on! The Spell Check's having a conniption over this!
"...So you're all here, then." Thanks for the update, Captain Obvious, or rather Commander Hope.
"A-Ah, the commander's here..." And you as well, upper class twit.
"You five are the successful candidates from this year's Gauntlet Rite."
"Five...? People came from all over the Kingdom and only five were chosen?" Nice observation, Walter. No, seriously, are these things really that picky?
"Are you truly so surprised? Five is a much bigger crop than usual!" Shut up, Navarre! Nobody likes you!
"Cut the chitchat, Navarre." What Commander Hope said, maybe he isn't such a bad guy after all.
"What!? I was hardly the only--!" Yes, you were.
"We will now begin your practical training." Of course, of course, let's start orientation already. "Henceforth, you will all be making forays into Naraku."
"Naraku...? If I recall correctly, that is reportedly the place where demons..." ...come from? Father of monsters and all. Again what does this have to do with an InuYasha villian?
"Demons?" Yeah, Walter, demons. That's nothing unusual in a MegaTen game.
"You're Jonathan, yes? You seem very well-informed."
"My father never would reveal to me the Samurai's true mission...So it involves vanquishing demons..." I'm just wondering why your father decided to hide that truth from you, Isabeau.
"Today, you will enter Naraku and receive basic Samurai training as you battle demons." Here comes the forced tutorial level. "You'll be given a small stipend to prepare yourselves, as well as a few common supplies."
> You received 300 Macca and Healing Water x5.
"There are shops here in the square that handle what you'll need. Each of you will enter Naraku as soon as you're ready. I'll be in touch by and by with the details of the exercise. You're all dismissed. Go and make yourselves ready for training."
> Shimohi goes to Q's Blacksmith.
"Young Samurai, please feel free to call me Q." Do you know of a ship called the 'U.S.S Enterprise'? "It would please me if my shop's weapons and armor were of use to you."
Oh! A Sharp Sword! With a power of 67 (vs the Samurai Sword's 54)! But damn it, it costs 800 macca!
(a few seconds latter...) ...DAMN IT EVERYTHING'S OUT OF MY PRICE RANGE! Discount my ass!
> Shimohi goes to B's Apothocary.
"It is an honor to meet you, young Samurai. I am called B." That's hard to 'believe' "I supply sundries to the many Samurai here." Well, let's see what you have (in my price range)...
- Healing Water: Price 35 macca.
- Revival Leaf: Price 210 macca.
- Detox Solution: Price 105 macca.
> Shimohi goes to the Naraku Entrance.
"You've come, newly chosen one." Yeah that's nice, random guard A. "Past here is Naraku, the cavern of evil where the demons from the fables you've heard exist in the flesh." This...is going...to be...AWESOME! "Have you come fully prepared, with weapons, armor, and supplies at the ready...?
"I'm prepared." ...as I'll ever be, didn't have enough to get much of anything.
"Then go and face the training exercises. And try not to be slain." I'll do my best...
> The atmosphere here is unlike any you've felt before in your life...
OK...
> You feel a chill creep slowly down your spine...
Who ate a burrito before coming down here?
> Shimohi inspects the nearby sign, "Go forth, fellow Samurai. Those who descend these stairs and live to climb them again will be renowned as heroes." ...So the sign says.
I'm guessing a lot of people become 'an hero' over this...and another sign, must...check...
> Shimohi inspects another sign, "Well done, fellow Samurai, in your fight against the demons. Rest at the barracks and heal the day's wounds." ...so the sign says.
Was I supposed to see this after the tutorial level? How's that for going off the rails!
> Shimohi descends down the spiral staircase...to see another sign at the bottom. "Praise be to the brave Samurai! And let us mourn our comrades who have fallen before achieving their goals." ...So the sign says.
Two words: Epic Fail.
> Shimohi enters the archway into the hallway...and sees yet another sign (You don't have to stop and read every sign, you know.), "Beware the appearance of demons." ...So the sign says.
Might as well tack on a passive-aggressive sticky note reading, "Thanks for the update, Captain Obvious."
> The Gauntlet suddenly began to emit a light.
I swear, that's not me describing my own actions in-game style again.
> Something appeared on the Gauntlet's LCD monitor...
"... Hello, human." [sarcasm] And now a mysterious voice came out of my Gauntlet, now today's complete. [/sarcasm] "I'm Burroughs, a navigational AI. I've acknowledged you as my user. It's good to meet you." OK, I didn't mention it earlier. But, I can definitely say, without a doubt...that this thing is most definitely not mystical, not quite magical, and most definitely mysterious.
"This is Hope speaking." Hey, this thing functions as a video phone. Sweet! "I'm scrying on all of your positions through Burroughs." Well, 'Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic'. "I see you're all in Naraku now. Let me explain your first training exercise.You must begin by learning the basics of combat through battle with demons. Fighting demons is a necessary skill for Samurai." Maybe this gig isn't as bad as I thought. "Your task is to defeat a demon inside Naraku. Any demon will do. Burroughs, the sprite who dwells in that Gauntlet, will support you." But Burroughs herself described herself as 'a navigational AI' not a sprite...you know what, never mind. "That is all for now. You should commence your training at once."
"I can explain how my interface works. You want me to?"
"Proceed." ...Navi. What...Burroughs did describe herself as a 'navi'gational AI, so it's...yeah, I'm making a reference to Navi, the fairy, from The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time.
>The system tells me how the menu works.
"Did you get all that?"
"I did indeed." Took the words right out of my mouth, Atlus.
> The system now tells me now to save the game.
"Did you get all that?"
"I did indeed" Oh...Kay...a bit repetitive, but OK (And, yes, I see the hypocrisy there).
"That's all the support I have for now. Until next time, Master Shimohi."
"Burroughs..."...Save the game! And, yes, this sounds like I'm using Google Glass.
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Well, that was, Shin Megami Tensei IV the First Impressions. Wow, this really turned into something like a text-based Let's Play. If this post gets enough attention (though views and comments), I might turn this into an actual text-based LP. I'll just wait and see how this goes...
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